EMPATHY - (There’s pain in him, not necessarily something as straightforward as disbelief. He was hurting, is hurting, and will probably keep hurting.)
Harry groans and puts his head in his hands. He wishes he could’ve just screamed instead. It could’ve worked. His wings tuck around his body, he’s doing his best to hide from Jean. Jean his satellite officer. His inferior. It is probably impossible for Jean to think any less of him than he already does but maybe he was wrong about that too. Maybe he can sink even lower. Maybe he’s never really seen the abyssopelagic zone of Jean's esteem.
“So…I haven’t said this before, then.”
PHYSICAL INSTRUMENT - (You can’t even do this f****t shit right. This is humiliating.)
ENDURANCE - (Now tell him the truth. You cry when you think about men touching you. Tell him you have a stupid little crush on the Lieutenant.)
[I'm not telling him about that! I’m not saying any of that! Fuck you guys.]
PAIN THRESHOLD - (Two nights ago you put out your cigarette on your thigh while you thought about him. There is a little round scar hidden away in the small expanse of bare skin on your thigh.)
EMPATHY - (The Lieutenant would never do that to you. You know he wouldn’t.)
ELECTROCHEMISTRY - (It feels like how a kiss should feel. Like a wound but sweeter.)
cw internalized homophobia, censored slurs, masochism, possible self harm (it’s Harry)
Harry groans and puts his head in his hands. He wishes he could’ve just screamed instead. It could’ve worked. His wings tuck around his body, he’s doing his best to hide from Jean. Jean his satellite officer. His inferior. It is probably impossible for Jean to think any less of him than he already does but maybe he was wrong about that too. Maybe he can sink even lower. Maybe he’s never really seen the abyssopelagic zone of Jean's esteem.
“So…I haven’t said this before, then.”
PHYSICAL INSTRUMENT - (You can’t even do this f****t shit right. This is humiliating.)
ENDURANCE - (Now tell him the truth. You cry when you think about men touching you. Tell him you have a stupid little crush on the Lieutenant.)
[I'm not telling him about that! I’m not saying any of that! Fuck you guys.]
PAIN THRESHOLD - (Two nights ago you put out your cigarette on your thigh while you thought about him. There is a little round scar hidden away in the small expanse of bare skin on your thigh.)
EMPATHY - (The Lieutenant would never do that to you. You know he wouldn’t.)
ELECTROCHEMISTRY - (It feels like how a kiss should feel. Like a wound but sweeter.)